This is the next in a series of meaningful conversations.
• Meaning is a subjective, emotional, inside job. Here again, we’ve got to be responsible for what things mean to us and realize they might mean something else to someone else
• Everyone is not like you and does not think like you, and that’s a good thing, imagine a world of people with the same strengths and weakness; that means when you have a blind spot or a weakness, you can probably find someone who isn’t blind and is strong where you’re blind and weak
• Wholeness – a more complete and accurate perception, is more likely when two or more are gathered to seek it. Individuals miss a lot; have filters – personal quirks, different cultures, experiences, tastes, appreciations – think about siblings in same families
• If you always do what you always did…. You’ll be frozen, unable to move forward. Stuck. So do it differently; get a different perspective, a different person involved
• Others see what we don’t; everybody’s not gonna go bungee jumping or wants to be a surgeon
• We can’t know everything; [dogs hear more and cats see more] but help is available. You’ve got to know you need it, then ask for it before you get it
• If you think you know, you won’t ask and you’re stuck with only what you already know, in an endless loop of always doing what you always did
o Better – more likely to grow and succeed, not to know; to keep an open mind and hold what we know lightly
• Is what you’ve labeled a ‘problem’, really a problem? Why is it in your life? Is it here to punish you, or grow you? What’s your view of life – is it a struggle in a dog-eat-dog world, or a series of opportunities in a helpful universe? Could the person giving you all this grief, really be the help you need, an angel? Angels come in all shapes and sizes, very few of them have wings
• What’s the point? To win? To avoid pain, guilt and blame? To die with the most toys? To wipe out the other guy? How are you keeping score? Consider Rotary’s Four Way pledge and to be in and come from That Place
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Friday, February 12, 2010
Meaningful Conversations 3
This is the third part of a multi-part post on meaningful conversations.
So, how do you learn to be more authentic, share what’s most important to you and have a meaningful conversation?
There are 12 things to remember and practice.
Most important, be patient and gentle with yourself; you won’t get all of this overnight: there’s a steep learning curve. But you will have many opportunities to get it right, get help and practice.
• Spirit of Exploration: enter this work with openness, optimism, vision, faith; realizing how risky, rough and rugged it is, but also, how very rewarding
• Perception is Unreliable: Appearances are Deceiving – must figure things out for one’s self; be your own scientist/empiricist; be responsible
• No objective reality for the most meaningful things – facts, at the most important levels – Social, Economic, Moral, where values are involved [and they’re always involved] at best, there is consensus reality.
• Meaning is a subjective, emotional, inside job. Here again, we’ve got to be responsible for what things mean to us and realize they might mean something else to someone else
• Everyone is not like you and does not think like you, and that’s a good thing, imagine a world of people with the same strengths and weakness; that means when you have a blind spot or a weakness, you can probably find someone who isn’t blind and is strong where you’re blind and weak
• Wholeness and the Wisdom of Crowds – a more complete and accurate perception, is more likely when two or more are gathered to seek it. Individuals miss a lot; have filters – personal quirks, different cultures, experiences, tastes, appreciations – think about siblings in same families
• If you always do what you always did…. You’ll be frozen, unable to move forward. Stuck. So do it differently; get a different perspective, a different person involved
• Others see what we don’t; everybody’s not gonna go bungee jumping or wants to be a surgeon
• We can’t know everything; [dogs hear more and cats see more] but help is available. You’ve got to know you need it, then ask for it before you get it
So, how do you learn to be more authentic, share what’s most important to you and have a meaningful conversation?
There are 12 things to remember and practice.
Most important, be patient and gentle with yourself; you won’t get all of this overnight: there’s a steep learning curve. But you will have many opportunities to get it right, get help and practice.
• Spirit of Exploration: enter this work with openness, optimism, vision, faith; realizing how risky, rough and rugged it is, but also, how very rewarding
• Perception is Unreliable: Appearances are Deceiving – must figure things out for one’s self; be your own scientist/empiricist; be responsible
• No objective reality for the most meaningful things – facts, at the most important levels – Social, Economic, Moral, where values are involved [and they’re always involved] at best, there is consensus reality.
• Meaning is a subjective, emotional, inside job. Here again, we’ve got to be responsible for what things mean to us and realize they might mean something else to someone else
• Everyone is not like you and does not think like you, and that’s a good thing, imagine a world of people with the same strengths and weakness; that means when you have a blind spot or a weakness, you can probably find someone who isn’t blind and is strong where you’re blind and weak
• Wholeness and the Wisdom of Crowds – a more complete and accurate perception, is more likely when two or more are gathered to seek it. Individuals miss a lot; have filters – personal quirks, different cultures, experiences, tastes, appreciations – think about siblings in same families
• If you always do what you always did…. You’ll be frozen, unable to move forward. Stuck. So do it differently; get a different perspective, a different person involved
• Others see what we don’t; everybody’s not gonna go bungee jumping or wants to be a surgeon
• We can’t know everything; [dogs hear more and cats see more] but help is available. You’ve got to know you need it, then ask for it before you get it
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Meaningful Conversations 2
This is the second part of a multi-part post.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful, absolutely great, if you could have a meaningful conversation, be authentic and share what you really care about and what’s most important to you?
Think about it. How would if feel? Would you have less stress? Be more relaxed? Enjoy your work more? Be more productive? Manage your time more effectively?
Why is that? Why does being authentic and sharing what you really care about, what’s most important and meaningful, make you more attractive and make your life flow?
Because, we’re Energy Beings and what’s most important and meaningful to us, sets us vibrating at our highest and best.
What’s most important and meaningful, comes to us from our highest and best, from Spirit.
The energy we are vibrates at four frequencies, from least dense, invisible and universal, to most dense, visible and specific – from spiritual, through mental, through emotional to physical.
Thus, connecting with others in a meaningful way, not only allows us to express our highest vibrations, it allows them to express theirs, too. And together we reinforce one another and increase and expand the power of our highest vibrations.
Unfortunately, the same increase and expansion happens when we connect with others at our most negative vibrational levels.
As more and more of us start connecting at our highest vibrational level, and having meaningful conversations is a way to do that, the vibrational level all around us will change. And that change will have an impact on us and the planet similar to the impact Columbus’ discovery of America had. It will be like going from the idea the world is flat, to understanding it is round. Immense power and benefit will be unleashed.
So, how do you do this? How do you learn to be more authentic, share what’s most important to you and have a meaningful conversation?
There are 12 things to remember and practice.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful, absolutely great, if you could have a meaningful conversation, be authentic and share what you really care about and what’s most important to you?
Think about it. How would if feel? Would you have less stress? Be more relaxed? Enjoy your work more? Be more productive? Manage your time more effectively?
Why is that? Why does being authentic and sharing what you really care about, what’s most important and meaningful, make you more attractive and make your life flow?
Because, we’re Energy Beings and what’s most important and meaningful to us, sets us vibrating at our highest and best.
What’s most important and meaningful, comes to us from our highest and best, from Spirit.
The energy we are vibrates at four frequencies, from least dense, invisible and universal, to most dense, visible and specific – from spiritual, through mental, through emotional to physical.
Thus, connecting with others in a meaningful way, not only allows us to express our highest vibrations, it allows them to express theirs, too. And together we reinforce one another and increase and expand the power of our highest vibrations.
Unfortunately, the same increase and expansion happens when we connect with others at our most negative vibrational levels.
As more and more of us start connecting at our highest vibrational level, and having meaningful conversations is a way to do that, the vibrational level all around us will change. And that change will have an impact on us and the planet similar to the impact Columbus’ discovery of America had. It will be like going from the idea the world is flat, to understanding it is round. Immense power and benefit will be unleashed.
So, how do you do this? How do you learn to be more authentic, share what’s most important to you and have a meaningful conversation?
There are 12 things to remember and practice.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Meaningful Conversations 1
This is the first of a multi-part series on meaningful conversations.
Meaningful conversations energize and motivate us, make our hearts and minds thrill, make life more exciting and worthwhile. So, why don’t we have more of them? Fear, embarrassment, fear of rejection, fear of being too personal or imposing on others.
But what if we thought of Life as a giant jigsaw puzzle and that the important things deep inside you, things you see, but others don’t, are pieces of that puzzle?
All of us have thoughts and feelings – hopes, dreams and visions no one else has. What if we knew that the giant jigsaw puzzle of Life won’t be complete ‘till we share our pieces? Deep down we do know this and there is a deep desire to see the puzzle complete, to share our pieces and be fulfilled. But we’re afraid.
For example, you’re at a networking meeting.
And you feel like sharing what’s in your heart, the really meaningful important stuff, just letting your guard down and sharing the joy, fears, sadness and pain, hope and optimism. Has that ever happened to you?
You want to drop the mask of the cool professional and reveal what you really care about, what’s most important to you, as well as what really frightens and worries you. Has that ever happened to you?
You don’t want to prove anything, to influence or change anyone, you just want to talk, to have a meaningful conversation; to connect with somebody in an open, honest and meaningful way; not to win anything, or blame anyone, or to reinforce you own POV but to join with others, to belong and be a part of something meaningful and really worthwhile?
Where do you suppose those feelings, the desire to do that, come from?
When those feelings come up, what do you usually do with them? Stuff ‘em? Think they’re inappropriate for a meeting like this; delusional; wishful thinking; not achievable; shouldn’t be achieved, bad for good order and business?
What if all those reasons are wrong; not only wrong, but harmful? What if the desire to have a meaningful conversation comes from our souls, our connection with Spirit – the highest and best within us, and the reasons to deny it, come from the opposite place?
Wouldn’t it be wonderful, absolutely great, if you could be authentic and share what you really care about and what’s most important to you?
Think about it. How would if feel? Would you have less stress? Be more relaxed? Enjoy your work more? Be more productive? Manage your time more effectively?
Meaningful conversations energize and motivate us, make our hearts and minds thrill, make life more exciting and worthwhile. So, why don’t we have more of them? Fear, embarrassment, fear of rejection, fear of being too personal or imposing on others.
But what if we thought of Life as a giant jigsaw puzzle and that the important things deep inside you, things you see, but others don’t, are pieces of that puzzle?
All of us have thoughts and feelings – hopes, dreams and visions no one else has. What if we knew that the giant jigsaw puzzle of Life won’t be complete ‘till we share our pieces? Deep down we do know this and there is a deep desire to see the puzzle complete, to share our pieces and be fulfilled. But we’re afraid.
For example, you’re at a networking meeting.
And you feel like sharing what’s in your heart, the really meaningful important stuff, just letting your guard down and sharing the joy, fears, sadness and pain, hope and optimism. Has that ever happened to you?
You want to drop the mask of the cool professional and reveal what you really care about, what’s most important to you, as well as what really frightens and worries you. Has that ever happened to you?
You don’t want to prove anything, to influence or change anyone, you just want to talk, to have a meaningful conversation; to connect with somebody in an open, honest and meaningful way; not to win anything, or blame anyone, or to reinforce you own POV but to join with others, to belong and be a part of something meaningful and really worthwhile?
Where do you suppose those feelings, the desire to do that, come from?
When those feelings come up, what do you usually do with them? Stuff ‘em? Think they’re inappropriate for a meeting like this; delusional; wishful thinking; not achievable; shouldn’t be achieved, bad for good order and business?
What if all those reasons are wrong; not only wrong, but harmful? What if the desire to have a meaningful conversation comes from our souls, our connection with Spirit – the highest and best within us, and the reasons to deny it, come from the opposite place?
Wouldn’t it be wonderful, absolutely great, if you could be authentic and share what you really care about and what’s most important to you?
Think about it. How would if feel? Would you have less stress? Be more relaxed? Enjoy your work more? Be more productive? Manage your time more effectively?
Monday, February 8, 2010
Alchemy 3
This is a continuation of the previous posts on Alchemy. Please see the earlier posts to get the most from this work.
A key step in the alchemy of transforming your struggles into flow is to reprogram your triggers. First we’ll identify the triggers, then reprogram them using all Seven Transformational Strategies:
o Visioning and Intentionality.
o Both/and Thinking.
o Readiness and Always at Choice.
o Mindfulness and Awareness.
o Full Acceptance.
o Emptiness
Please take out a clean piece of 8x11 paper. Divide the page into three equal parts, by drawing two horizontal lines completely across the page. You’re going to write in the top third first. Ready? You’ve got 60 seconds to write down the major sources of struggle stress and pain in your life right now. It might be bills or traffic. Write what’s specific to you. The more specific you are, the better. Go! OK. These are your external triggers.
Get ready to write again. Move down the page to the second part. Ready? Sixty seconds to write down the places in your body where you feel this stress, pain and struggle first, and most. Go! These are your internal physical triggers.
Get ready to write again. Move down the page to the last part. You’ve got 60 seconds to write down the thoughts and feelings that come up when you feel stress. Go. These are your internal inner triggers.
Before we can reprogram these triggers, we’ve got to get anchored in flow. What is flow? How does it feel? Is it worth working towards? Where does it come from (inside, out)?(What is “flow” to you? Give me some other words for “flow”: grace, ease, effortlessness. . . . What is flow like: spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically?) Close your eyes and feel it, let yourself be filled with flow. Pause.
When do you do your best work? When you’re struggling, or in flow? When are you likely to be most effective and successful? When you’re in emotional or physical pain and stressed out?
Would you believe, just in setting an anchor in flow, you used, or enabled, six of the Seven Transformational Strategies? Let’s take a look. Anchoring in flow gives you a clear vision of what you want and sets an intention to get it. Both/and thinking shows that movement along the continuum towards flow, is possible. Readiness suggests that you’re always at choice, because flow is always an option. Being anchored makes you aware and mindful of where you are on the continuum, and able to fully accept that place within the context of Vision. While emptiness lets you release where you are and create a vacuum, so you can attract your good.
Anchoring in flow teaches that if you change, everything changes. That, if you’re clear and easy, what you need to do becomes clear and easy. So Alchemists use the Seven Transformational Strategies to change themselves, not the situation, knowing that once they are transformed, they will experience the situation differently, and thus will have transformed the situation, too.
You can experience that now, as you reprogram your triggers. From what you’ve written in part one, select a situation you’re struggling with that’s causing you stress. Got it? OK. Get in touch with the thoughts and feelings that go with that situation, the ones you wrote in part two. Got ‘em?
Now put your hand (or hands) on the place (or places) on your body where you feel that stress. Done? Now, connect with your flow. Breathe deeply. Lean back. Feel your muscles relax. Breathe deeply. The flow fills you. With each breath, feel yourself melt into your chair. Now you’re fully connected with your flow.
Gently press the trigger point your hand is on. Now, gently tap the trigger point. Breathe deeply. The pressure and tapping are anchoring flow into this trigger point, reprogramming it. The deep breathing, gentle pressure and tapping transform this place in your body from a trigger for stress to a trigger for success.
The next time you experience stress and struggle, you remember to press and tap this place in your body. This trigger is now an invitation to think like an Alchemist and transform struggle into flow using all Seven of the Transformational Strategies. Remember, just start where you are in the System, then cycle through the rest:
o Visioning and Intentionality.
o Both/and Thinking.
o Readiness and Always at Choice.
o Mindfulness and Awareness.
o Full Acceptance.
o Emptiness
o And Reprogramming your Triggers
The magic, the Alchemy, is not that difficult situations are gone from your life, but that you experience them differently; that you transform struggle and pain and stress into opportunities for flow and success. The goal is to experience the relationship between success, struggle and flow differently, to experience it as an Alchemist experiences it, in both/and terms on a continuum, as a cue to use all Seven of the Transformational Strategies to turn the lead of your struggle and stress, into the gold of your flow and success.
A key step in the alchemy of transforming your struggles into flow is to reprogram your triggers. First we’ll identify the triggers, then reprogram them using all Seven Transformational Strategies:
o Visioning and Intentionality.
o Both/and Thinking.
o Readiness and Always at Choice.
o Mindfulness and Awareness.
o Full Acceptance.
o Emptiness
Please take out a clean piece of 8x11 paper. Divide the page into three equal parts, by drawing two horizontal lines completely across the page. You’re going to write in the top third first. Ready? You’ve got 60 seconds to write down the major sources of struggle stress and pain in your life right now. It might be bills or traffic. Write what’s specific to you. The more specific you are, the better. Go! OK. These are your external triggers.
Get ready to write again. Move down the page to the second part. Ready? Sixty seconds to write down the places in your body where you feel this stress, pain and struggle first, and most. Go! These are your internal physical triggers.
Get ready to write again. Move down the page to the last part. You’ve got 60 seconds to write down the thoughts and feelings that come up when you feel stress. Go. These are your internal inner triggers.
Before we can reprogram these triggers, we’ve got to get anchored in flow. What is flow? How does it feel? Is it worth working towards? Where does it come from (inside, out)?(What is “flow” to you? Give me some other words for “flow”: grace, ease, effortlessness. . . . What is flow like: spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically?) Close your eyes and feel it, let yourself be filled with flow. Pause.
When do you do your best work? When you’re struggling, or in flow? When are you likely to be most effective and successful? When you’re in emotional or physical pain and stressed out?
Would you believe, just in setting an anchor in flow, you used, or enabled, six of the Seven Transformational Strategies? Let’s take a look. Anchoring in flow gives you a clear vision of what you want and sets an intention to get it. Both/and thinking shows that movement along the continuum towards flow, is possible. Readiness suggests that you’re always at choice, because flow is always an option. Being anchored makes you aware and mindful of where you are on the continuum, and able to fully accept that place within the context of Vision. While emptiness lets you release where you are and create a vacuum, so you can attract your good.
Anchoring in flow teaches that if you change, everything changes. That, if you’re clear and easy, what you need to do becomes clear and easy. So Alchemists use the Seven Transformational Strategies to change themselves, not the situation, knowing that once they are transformed, they will experience the situation differently, and thus will have transformed the situation, too.
You can experience that now, as you reprogram your triggers. From what you’ve written in part one, select a situation you’re struggling with that’s causing you stress. Got it? OK. Get in touch with the thoughts and feelings that go with that situation, the ones you wrote in part two. Got ‘em?
Now put your hand (or hands) on the place (or places) on your body where you feel that stress. Done? Now, connect with your flow. Breathe deeply. Lean back. Feel your muscles relax. Breathe deeply. The flow fills you. With each breath, feel yourself melt into your chair. Now you’re fully connected with your flow.
Gently press the trigger point your hand is on. Now, gently tap the trigger point. Breathe deeply. The pressure and tapping are anchoring flow into this trigger point, reprogramming it. The deep breathing, gentle pressure and tapping transform this place in your body from a trigger for stress to a trigger for success.
The next time you experience stress and struggle, you remember to press and tap this place in your body. This trigger is now an invitation to think like an Alchemist and transform struggle into flow using all Seven of the Transformational Strategies. Remember, just start where you are in the System, then cycle through the rest:
o Visioning and Intentionality.
o Both/and Thinking.
o Readiness and Always at Choice.
o Mindfulness and Awareness.
o Full Acceptance.
o Emptiness
o And Reprogramming your Triggers
The magic, the Alchemy, is not that difficult situations are gone from your life, but that you experience them differently; that you transform struggle and pain and stress into opportunities for flow and success. The goal is to experience the relationship between success, struggle and flow differently, to experience it as an Alchemist experiences it, in both/and terms on a continuum, as a cue to use all Seven of the Transformational Strategies to turn the lead of your struggle and stress, into the gold of your flow and success.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
Alchemy 2
Alchemists see things that other people don’t - patterns, connections and relationships that are invisible to others. And they use the power in these relationships to turn lead into gold, struggle into flow.
The most powerful pattern they see that we don’t is the connection between everything. While we tend to see things in either/or terms, as disconnected and mutually exclusive, they see things in both/and terms, as connected and inclusive.
Let’s draw that. Please take out a clean piece of 8x11 paper. To an Alchemist, struggle and flow are not mutually exclusive, they are connected, opposite polarities, on a continuum. At the top of your paper, draw a straight horizontal line, from left to right. At the left end of your line, write “struggle;” at the right end, write “flow.” See, they are connected. That’s what a continuum does, it connects things. To an Alchemist, the continuum shows that flow may be found within struggle and therefore, because they’re just opposite, but connected ends of a continuum, it’s possible to transform struggle into flow.
Now drop down, leave some space, and draw two circles about the size of eggs. Write “struggle” in the circle on the left, and “flow” in the circle on the right. Here, struggle and flow are not connected and never can be. This is either/or thinking, the everyday world’s thinking. No magic here, because there’s no connection. It’s either struggle or flow, lead or gold. The magic is perceiving a connection others don’t.
Which kind of thinking would you prefer? Which would give you more power and bring magic into your life?
The most powerful pattern they see that we don’t is the connection between everything. While we tend to see things in either/or terms, as disconnected and mutually exclusive, they see things in both/and terms, as connected and inclusive.
Let’s draw that. Please take out a clean piece of 8x11 paper. To an Alchemist, struggle and flow are not mutually exclusive, they are connected, opposite polarities, on a continuum. At the top of your paper, draw a straight horizontal line, from left to right. At the left end of your line, write “struggle;” at the right end, write “flow.” See, they are connected. That’s what a continuum does, it connects things. To an Alchemist, the continuum shows that flow may be found within struggle and therefore, because they’re just opposite, but connected ends of a continuum, it’s possible to transform struggle into flow.
Now drop down, leave some space, and draw two circles about the size of eggs. Write “struggle” in the circle on the left, and “flow” in the circle on the right. Here, struggle and flow are not connected and never can be. This is either/or thinking, the everyday world’s thinking. No magic here, because there’s no connection. It’s either struggle or flow, lead or gold. The magic is perceiving a connection others don’t.
Which kind of thinking would you prefer? Which would give you more power and bring magic into your life?
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Alchemy
Alchemy, rooted in ancient science, seeks to transform lead into gold, pain into success. Alchemy can transform the lead in your life - the fear, pain and struggle, into the gold of success, confidence, joy, and flow. What does gold feel like to you - who are you with, what are you doing? What does lead feel like – what do you fear? Where is your pain?
Alchemists use Seven Transformational Strategies that work together as a system. It’s easy to use, you can start anywhere in the system, with any individual strategy, then cycle through the others.
o First, Visioning and Intentionality. This is about your values and knowing, beyond doubt, that there is something else, a greater, more loving reality that you are always part of and moving towards, even when you don’t realize it. This is the Alchemists’ gold.
o Next, Both/and Thinking. We’ll talk more about that in a little while
o Next is Readiness and Always at Choice. This involves using intuition, Knowing by doing and Living it out
o Then, Mindfulness and Awareness, being alert and tuned-in to your thoughts and feelings most of the time.
o Full Acceptance is next. This is facing the cold hard facts in the context of Vision and values. It’s clearly seeing present conditions and not denying them, while realizing it’s all taking you where you need to go and that what you resist, persists
o Emptiness, is next. This is about creating a vacuum. It involves trust and faith, letting go, releasing and giving over to the greater reality, so Vision and true values can fill the space
o And last, Reprogramming Triggers
More about each of these in future posts.
Alchemists use Seven Transformational Strategies that work together as a system. It’s easy to use, you can start anywhere in the system, with any individual strategy, then cycle through the others.
o First, Visioning and Intentionality. This is about your values and knowing, beyond doubt, that there is something else, a greater, more loving reality that you are always part of and moving towards, even when you don’t realize it. This is the Alchemists’ gold.
o Next, Both/and Thinking. We’ll talk more about that in a little while
o Next is Readiness and Always at Choice. This involves using intuition, Knowing by doing and Living it out
o Then, Mindfulness and Awareness, being alert and tuned-in to your thoughts and feelings most of the time.
o Full Acceptance is next. This is facing the cold hard facts in the context of Vision and values. It’s clearly seeing present conditions and not denying them, while realizing it’s all taking you where you need to go and that what you resist, persists
o Emptiness, is next. This is about creating a vacuum. It involves trust and faith, letting go, releasing and giving over to the greater reality, so Vision and true values can fill the space
o And last, Reprogramming Triggers
More about each of these in future posts.
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