Paraprosdokian Sentences (what ever the hell that is? Well I'll tell ya)
A paraprosdokian (from Greek, meaning "beyond" and
"expectation") is a figure of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is
surprising or unexpected in a way that causes the reader or listener to reframe or reinterpret the first part. It is frequently used for humorous or dramatic effect, sometimes producing an anticlimax. For this reason, it is extremely popular among comedians and satirists. Some paraprosdokians not only change the meaning of an early phrase, but also play on the double meaning of a particular word, creating a syllepsis.
Ø Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of every
successful man is usually another woman.
Ø A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
Ø You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a
parachute to skydive more than once.
Ø The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good
ideas!
Ø Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
Ø A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way
that you will look forward to the trip.
Ø Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at home, even if
you wish they were.
Ø Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live
with.
Ø I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to be
devoured by a great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my
foot.
Ø Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they
go.
Ø I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.
Ø I always take life with a grain of salt, plus a slice of lemon, and a
shot of tequila.
Ø When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire
Department usually uses water.
Ø You're never too old to learn something stupid.
Ø To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit
the target.
Ø Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
Ø Some people hear voices. Some see invisible people. Others have
no imagination whatsoever.
Ø A bus is a vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as
when you are in it.
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